An Excerpt from Wild Courage
Google executive Jenny Wood writes about nine unconventional personal traits that, when effectively utilized, can lead to life-changing success.
What if the traits you need to succeed are the opposite of what you've been taught?
In her new book, Wild Courage, Google executive Jenny Wood reclaims nine words that are often perceived negatively, such as “weird,” “shameless,” and “reckless,” and illustrates how these traits can be effectively harnessed to bring about personal success. Whether you want to impress a new boss, pursue a promotion, or secure a groundbreaking deal, this book offers valuable insights on using these unorthodox characteristics to your advantage.
In this excerpt, Wood examines the term “nosy,” highlighting how a touch of nosiness can be not only beneficial but potentially life-saving.
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Curiosity may be dangerous for cats, but it saved my grandmother’s life.
Hungary, 1944. Violet—Bubby to me—and thirty other desperate, terrified Jews hid in a cramped apartment while Hungarian soldiers of the ruling Arrow Cross Party swept the streets of Budapest, rounding up candidates for Auschwitz. Tens of thousands of Hungarian Jews had already been sent to the notorious concentration camp, most of whom became part of the six million Jews and eleven million human beings in total murdered by the Nazis during the Holocaust.
When supplies in the hideout ran dangerously low, Violet boldly ventured out for a bucket of water for her fellow Jews. Unfortunately, a group of Arrow Cross soldiers caught her, along with several others, and marched the captives several blocks at gunpoint.
Backs against a wall, the Jews waited to discover their fate: a one-way trip to Auschwitz—or summary execution. The latter seemed more likely; they had already passed several bodies during their short march. Bubby wasn’t resigned to this fate, however. My grandmother had always been self-assured and curious and saw no reason to restrain her nosiness now. Turning to face the young soldier pointing his rifle at her, she noticed how tightly he gripped the stock. She summoned the courage to dig deeper and ask a question.
“Excuse me, sir,” she said. “What would happen if I stepped out of line?”
The soldier laughed before answering with a Hungarian idiom: “A kisasszony tényleg ilyen hülye, vagy csak tetteti?” In English, “Is the young lady really this stupid, or is she only pretending to be?”
Telling this story in her Florida apartment more than half a century later, at ease in her beloved beige recliner, my bubby clarified that she never intended to disrespect the soldier. She was curious, not just for what he might say but also to judge his mood from his tone and facial expression.
“If he’d cocked the gun and shouted, ‘I’ll shoot you!’ that would have meant one thing,” she explained. “But there was a lightness to this young soldier’s answer. It gave me a flicker of hope. Staying meant certain death, one way or the other. The way he answered my question left an alternative open.”
With a smile and a shrug, Violet left the line without a look back. Heart pounding, she walked down the swastika-lined Budapest street. A moment passed, the heels of her sensible taupe leather shoes clicking on the cobblestones. She tried to breathe evenly. Displaying even a hint of panic would be disastrous. Still, nothing happened. She walked a little faster, yet there was no shout, no sound of heavy military boots thudding into the ground behind her. (All her life, the sound of hiking boots gave Bubby a jolt—she said they make a similar sound.) Eventually, Violet made it all the way back to her refuge, where she waited out the remainder of the war and survived the Holocaust. Most of our family did not.
Am I suggesting that any of the eleven million murdered people had the power to save themselves as Bubby did? Absolutely not. But l’dor v’dor—one generation teaching the next—is an important concept in Judaism. Bubby shared this lesson with me for a reason. Her curiosity saved her life and made my dad’s life—and mine—possible. Yes, asking the soldier a question represented a risk, but a relatively small one. The Jews on that street were doomed. Charging at him wouldn’t have gotten my slim, twenty-four-year-old grandmother out of that scrape. Nor would threats, bargaining, or promises. Being NOSY disarmed the soldier in a way no other tactic could, opening the door to survival. Lucky for me, Violet dared to ask a question.
What questions do you hesitate to ask? Why?
IN DEFENSE OF STICKING YOUR NOSE WHERE IT DOESN’T BELONG
If I had to point to one skill that’s gotten me where I am today, it’s curiosity. And curiosity is a skill. It’s genuinely hard for many of us, but anyone can work to cultivate it. Lucky for me, curiosity has always come naturally. I’m a busybody, and I’m not ashamed to admit it. Whenever we check in to a hotel, my husband, Jon, steps back from the front desk and gestures at me with an air of resignation: “Go on, Jenny, ask your questions.”
Curiosity is an attitude, but it’s also a super-practical business and life asset in the right here, right now sense. Want to meet someone special? Tell everyone in your network that you’re single. Get on all the apps. Go on lots (and lots) of dates with an attitude of flexibility, openness, and curiosity: attention and intention without a rush to judgment. Be NOSY, and you’ll find your match. It’s not magic but simple probability. Maximize those odds by getting curious instead of cynical. As my mom always said, turn worry into wonder. The same logic applies to job opportunities. And investments. And finding that one-in-a-million real estate agent, auto mechanic, or coach. Curiosity opens the faucet of serendipity.
